By LIFE has its own way of apportioning ups and downs for individuals. Some call it fate. That’s why you often hear the saying: different strokes for different folks. For Mama Chinedu, whose real name is Joy Ozobo, life has dealt a particularly cruel hand. She did not choose to be widowed twice within 21 years. Her second husband, Patrick, who passed about three weeks ago, was buried on Saturday, 25th October, at Abraka in Delta State. The dark-complexioned man was believed to be 55 years old, though further findings revealed he was 58.
Patrick came into Joy’s life sometime in 2023. Before then, Patrick, himself, had gone through two failed marriages — the first produced two boys, and the second, twin girls. For reasons best known to him, he ended both unions and later found companionship with Joy, a widow and mother-of-five from her first marriage to one Morgan Ofashi, a native of Kwale in Delta State.
Joy roasting corn at Ginuwa Junction, Warri – Sapele road, Warri, Delta State
Joy accepted Patrick’s proposal with gratitude, relief and expectations — after all, she had five mouths to feed daily: Blessing, Morgan, Destiny, Chinedu, and Favour, whose ages now range from 20 to nine. With Patrick, there was one more addition — Peace, a little girl barely two years old, born from their brief union.
Patrick was said to be preparing to pay Joy’s bride price before his untimely death. He had rented a room and parlour along the Warri–Sapele Road, near Ginuwa, for his newly-acquired family. From all indications, he was a dutiful man. But like her first husband, Patrick left too soon, leaving Joy back to square one, and her six children to fend for themselves.
Blessing, the eldest, is learning hairdressing. Her younger brother, Morgan, works in a nearby aluminium fabrication factory. Destiny, a girl, aged 14 is out of school at present. Chinedu, 11, is gradually becoming more of a street boy, seldom attending classes. Favour, aged nine, loves school but may soon have to drop out if things do not improve. Their mother now owes two months’ rent, ₦10,000 per month, and the landlord is threatening eviction.
Life of Struggle and Survival
I first spoke with Joy in 2023 at Ginuwa Junction, where she was roasting maize for sale — even while heavily pregnant for Patrick. Known in Warri parlance as a “hustler” (someone engaged in any legitimate means of survival), Joy juggles, till date, several trades: roasting corn, selling petrol in cans, and dealing in brake and engine oil. She does all this just to feed her children and keep body and soul together.
“My name is Joy Ozobo. I’m from Agbarha, and I’m 39 years old (as of 2023),” she told me. “I dropped out of secondary school after losing my parents because there was nobody to help me and my siblings. I started working as a salesgirl and later saved some money to learn tailoring.”
However, her apprenticeship ended abruptly when her boss — a pastor’s wife — was transferred to Lagos with her husband.
Fortune seemed to smile on Joy in 2006 when she met Morgan Ofashi, a welder from Kwale, who later became her husband. Together, they had the five children earlier mentioned. Joy described Morgan as a loving and caring man who treated her like a queen, knowing how much she had suffered neglect from the cradle.
But tragedy struck. “He had just returned from work one day, complaining of chest pain,” she recalled tearfully. “I had just given birth to our last child, Favour, who was only three months old. I rushed out to buy him some drugs, but before he could take them, he slumped and began to convulse. Neighbours helped to rush him to the General Hospital, but he died before they got there. He was just 40 years old.”
A Mother’s Burden
Since that fateful day, Joy has singlehandedly cared for her five children through sheer grit and hard work.
“The little hustles I do are not enough to take care of their needs,” she had lamented. “Two of them are about to enter secondary school now, and I don’t even know where to get the money from. I’m still trying to raise ₦6,000 to collect my son Morgan’s Primary Six certificate so he can continue his education.”
Her corn-roasting business is seasonal, and her petrol sales have become less profitable since the removal of fuel subsidy.
“We finish a four-litre bucket of garri in just three days. I can’t even estimate how much I spend on food daily,” she sighed.
When asked whether her late husband’s family had offered any help, Joy responded hesitantly: “At first, they were supportive, but as time went on, most of them stopped helping. Only two of his sisters still reach out occasionally — one sends foodstuff sometimes, while the other, who is a graduate, calls to check on us but hasn’t found a job yet.”
Joy expressed deep concern about raising her children in a rough neighbourhood.
“This area isn’t good for children, but I train them to know right from wrong. I show them how community boys punish thieves so they understand the consequences of crime. I always tell them not to take what doesn’t belong to them.”
Despite everything, Joy remains determined. “I just want them to finish secondary school and learn a trade. That’s my biggest dream,” she said.
A Cry for Help
Today, Joy is twice widowed. A chat with her on Thursday October 30 revealed a distressed mother being gradually overstretched. None of her six children, today, has a father. She herself is an orphan. Her siblings, most of them women, are fellow hustlers, struggling to eke a living.
Destiny, the third daughter, needs to return to school to write her JSS 3 exams. The fates of Chinedu and Favour hang in the balance.
In a society where poverty exposes young girls to predators waiting to prey on their vulnerability, the future of this family grows increasingly uncertain. The frailty of the kids, including their mother, is a testament to the dire financial state the family is.
Joy pleads for assistance from well-meaning Nigerians, kind-hearted individuals, and the government Hear her:
“I need help to train my children so that they can finish school and have a better future. Life has not been easy since my second husband died three weeks ago.
“I do not intend to marry again. Who would even marry a withering widow with six fatherless children? Who would? So, how these children will survive is my only worry.
“But don’t forget that I also need to offset my rent, else the landlord will lash at the demise of Patrick and throw us out into the cold. If that happens, where do I go with my children?”
Readers, led to render a helping hand, can reach out to the writer and publisher of Stonix News on: 08060113609.
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